Shadow of Death
by cmaddict
Summary: She spent the last moments of her life...doing what? Spoilers for Invaders. Please R&R!
1. Prologue

**A/N: The dialogue in this particular prologue is not mine. It was taken from the episode "Invaders". However, the thoughts of Alexandra Borgia are my own. I intend no copyright infringement, but I wanted this part to be as accurate as possible. Please don't sue, I'm just a poor college student.**

**A**/**N2: This story will be graphic. It chronicles Alex's last moments before she was brutally murdered. I'm telling you upfront that it may be disturbing, and currently I'm planning on going into detail. If you don't want to deal with that, I suggest you stop at the prologue.**

**Spoilers: Invaders. If you haven't seen the episode, you probably don't wanna read this.**

**Disclaimer: The characters of Law and Order are not mine. Do you honestly think that I would be writing on if they were?**

Prologue

"No, I'm on hold," Alex said as she unlocked the door to her apartment. "I've been holding for fifteen minutes." She tried to keep her exasperation out of her voice. _Be professional_. _Why is_ _it so damn hard to be professional with these stupid bureaucrats?_

She set her bag and coat on an end table next to her couch. "I'd like to-" She struggled to contain a frustrated sigh. "My name is Alexandra Borgia, I'm with the District Attorney in Manhattan, and I've left three messages." Alex was beginning to get sick of playing the run-around with these guys. _Feds can be so... exasperating sometimes._

She took out some leftovers from her refrigerator and practically threw them in the microwave. "Well, I'll speak with any drug enforcement agent in Washington Heights." She pressed the button on the microwave and leaned against the wall. _How much longer am I gonna have to put up with these idiots?_ "Yes, I'll hold." _Again_. "Thank you." _Watch, I'll spend all night on the phone with these jackasses and still get nowhere._

A knock at the door interrupted her silent venting. Alex crossed the small room and unlocked the door. She opened it to see two men… a white and a black. Like from the Dyckman Street homicides. _Oh, God_.

The white one pushed his way into her apartment, grabbing her by the chin. She grunted, trying to fight back, but he was just too strong. He pushed her into her bedroom and shoved her to the floor. He roughly grabbed her hands and head as she used the only weapon she had. Her voice. _Scream, Alex, dammit, scream!_ She yelled at the top of her lungs. _Please, someone, hear me! _But no one came. The black man quickly taped her mouth closed, and they hauled her to her feet and out the door.


	2. The Shadow of Death

**A/N: Okay, this chapter is definitely my work. All of it. Well, except the Bible verse.**

_Ugh. My head is killing me._ Alex felt something on her forehead, something hot and sticky. _Great. My head is bleeding._

Alex tried to move her hands to wipe it away, but for some reason she couldn't move. She tried to groan, but it sounded muffled to her ears. _Okay. They tied me up._ _At least they didn't blindfold or gag me. Yet_.

Alex glanced around her tiny prison. No windows, just a small fan in the corner of the room. _How nice of them._

_Where am I?_ She resisted the urge to cry. _I've faced down gangs with more people than the entire police force. I've dealt with kidnappers and mass murderers._ Then she realized that that was exactly who these men were. The urge to cry was even stronger now.

She managed to glance down at her watch. _Eight o'clock. I wonder what Jack's doing now._

Jack. The thought of him brought tears to her eyes again. She had talked to him about this latest case before… well, before this. The last thing he said to her was, "This isn't on you, Alex." _This isn't on me. All those people that were killed "isn't on me." I could have stopped it, and I didn't._

Her thoughts went back to Jack. _Surely by now he's discovered I'm gone. This is probably tearing him apart. Poor, compassionate Jack._ He had that rough edge to him, but deep down, he really cared about people. She saw that when they prosecuted Nurse Gloria for sterilizing young women without their knowledge.

She remembered when she first came to Homicide from the major cases division. She was green, almost fresh out of law school. And here she was, in every ADA's dream job.

She remembered Jack's reaction when she promised that one mother justice for her son. She knew then it might not be a promise she could keep. But she made it anyway. _Boy, he was furious, wasn't he?_ She almost laughed. _It wasn't so funny back then._

Alex sighed loudly. She heard voices outside her little holding cell. She began to feel that unmistakable panic rising from her stomach. _Oh, God_. It wasn't a curse. It was a prayer. _What are they gonna do to me? Please, God, don't let them hurt me._ She could feel the hot tears running down her cheeks. "The Lord is my shepherd," she whispered. "I shall not be in want. He makes me lie down in green pastures…"

The door opened, and two figures loomed ominously before her.

"Though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me…"


	3. You Are With Me

Alex's muttering was stopped cold by a vicious slap across her face. Her head flew back, and she nearly cried out when her teeth met the edge of her lip. Alex tasted blood in her mouth. "Shut up!" the white one hissed.

"Vincent," the black one motioned him over and whispered something in his ear.

_God, please protect me. Don't let me die._

The one called Vincent bent down before her and glared at her. Alex stared right back, holding his gaze. _Show him you're not afraid._

The other one moved around behind her and untied her. He roughly pulled her to her feet and held her in front of him.

"Where is Andreas?" Vincent asked as he grabbed her chin and forced her to look at him.

Alex shook her head, still in a fog from the slap. "I don't know," she mumbled.

Vincent shook his head and gave a mirthless smile. The smile disappeared as he pulled his fist back and brought it forward with all his strength.

Alex screamed as it connected with her stomach. She felt one of her ribs break, and she slumped forward in the black man's arms. He hauled her to her feet.

"Now, where is Andreas?"

Alex whimpered and tried to focus through the pain. The room swam before her eyes. "I don't know," she whispered.

Vincent nodded to the black man, and he released her. Alex sank to the floor, clutching her broken ribs. _Oh, man._ Her breath came in ragged gasps.

The two men bent over her. The black man reeled back and punched her in the chest. Alex screamed again.

Vincent cuffed her in the face. Alex sobbed, tears mingling with her blood. He battered her over and over in the face, chest, and stomach.

_The Lord is my shepherd_. Vincent's fist connected with her stomach.

_I shall not be in want._ The other one's connected with her broken ribs.

_He makes me lie down in green pastures._ Vincent's fist struck her face again. Alex felt some of her teeth go.

_He leads me beside quiet waters._ The other one hit her mouth. Alex attempted to spit out some of the blood.

_He restores my soul; he guides me in paths of righteousness for his name's sake._ Vincent hit her in the kidneys. Alex tried to curl into the fetal position, but Vincent grabbed her feet and the other one sat on her legs.

_Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me._ Vincent's fist battered her broken ribs again. Alex gasped in pain.

_Surely goodness and mercy will follow me all the days of my life, and I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever._ Vincent's fist connected with her face again, and Alex sank into blissful unconsciousness.


	4. Into Your Hands

Alex groaned in pain as she awoke from her unconscious state. Her entire body felt like it was on fire. _Where am I?_ She could hear horns honking. _I'm in a car._ She groaned as they went over a pothole.

She tried to spit out the blood that was pooling in her mouth, but it was covered with a piece of duct tape. Instead she swallowed it, and her stomach lurched.

_I'm going to die_, she thought. _They're going to kill me._

Alex tried to move her legs, but pain shot through her body. She screamed against the gag. _Okay, I know not to do that again._

She lay on her back, blood running down her face. She started to cry. _I'm really going to die._

_Jack_. She thought about her boss. _He's looking for me now. He'll find me._ Her tears mingled with her blood. _It's just a false hope. They will never find me in time._

She vomited into her gag, but there was nothing she could do about it. She breathed in the putrid stuff, and felt it go into her lungs. She knew what would happen, but there was nothing she could do.

_I'm sorry, Jack. I tried._

Alex vomited again. _Oh, Lord, if you can take this cup away from me, please do it._ She felt the regurgitation go into her lungs again. _But not my will, but yours be done._

Alex struggled to breathe. Her lungs burned, and her ribs ached with a pain she had never known before. She tried to take her mind off it. _What was that hymn we used to sing in church?_ She thought back to the last Sunday she had been in church. _I remember now._

She sang quietly in her head.

_When peace like a river attendeth my way,_

_When sorrow like sea billows roll,_

_Whatever my lot, Thou hast taught meto say,_

_It is well, it is well with my soul._

Alex vomited again. _I…can't…breathe._ She grew panicked. _Lord, I didn't know dying would be like this._

The words to that old hymn came to her mind again. '_Whatever my lot, Thou hast taught me to say, it is well, it is well with my soul.' It is well with my soul. It is well with my soul. _It comforted her. She remembered the words of a promise from long ago, something her mother had taught her. _In heaven there's no more pain, and God will wipe every tear from your eyes._ She smiled through the anguish. _That doesn't sound so bad._

She felt her breath fade away. _Our Father who art in heaven…_ Alex vomited again. Her chest and stomach felt like there were weights on them.

Jack came to her mind again.Her boss. No, he was more than that.He was a friend. Who was probably desperately searching for her. _Lord, watch over him. Help him see._ She gasped for one last breath, choking on her own vomit. _Father, into your hands I commit my spirit._

And Assistant District Attorney Alexandra Borgia breathed her last gasping breath.

* * *


End file.
